Sure, there’s merit to the saying, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me”, but there’s no doubt that words can still hurt. A sick, well-worded putdown can really burn.
These people couldn't stay quiet after seeing infuriating posts and they had the wittiest and most unexpected comebacks. Prepare to be entertained by these epic roasts!
People are Delusional
People love to blame people with no money for their situations and admire people with lots of money for their decisions.
Luckily, this person was happy to provide an explanation to the people who have trouble understanding the actual reality of the world. Until you're in a situation where you have no choice but to use that $600 for your basic needs, maybe you shouldn’t offer your perception of other people’s lives.
It's always so annoying when someone comes into your room and leaves without shutting the door on the way out. But all of a sudden, it just makes sense.
Turns out our parents actually do want to save us some embarrassment, contrary to what we might believe. Sometimes you get so used to your own stench, you don’t notice when it becomes unbearable.
Whoever runs Wendy’s Twitter is an utter savage. But having a national roast day—well we would expect nothing less than the hottest burns in history.
Oh Hooters, there are so many things to say about you. But Wendy’s went for a classic, simple roast about your tiny uniforms. This feisty redhead really came ready with facts. Does anyone else need some aloe to soothe that secondhand burn??
The Big Screen
Only people who have more money (and rooms) than they know what to do with have an entire in-home movie theater in their house.
And while this person was perhaps trying to comment something about the difference between poor and rich people and their choice of entertainment, instead they came off as ignorant and privileged. As this person reminds us, rich people live in abundance, with big libraries and big TVs. Don’t get it twisted.
If you insult a woman or question her life decisions in the same sentence as hitting on her, you're doing something wrong. Don’t worry though, because this woman clapped back when a man offered his rude and unnecessary opinion.
Who's asking you to be the stepdad to her kids? Because it's clearly not her. She even through in this epic burn along the way.
Outfit repeating has become something that we have become ashamed of. But this guy is right—have you ever heard a man tell a woman that she already wore that outfit?
In reality, it's other women who notice this. Women should focus on supporting each other instead of putting each other down for something as silly as wearing a dress more than one time.
How Many Karats?
It seems that people are more obsessed with the size of their engagement ring than the person giving it to them. If you're marrying someone, you should know their financial situation and understand what they can and can't afford.
Please, do not turn down a man’s proposal for a small ring. Let’s be real, there are enough reasons to say no to a man without blaming it on the size of a ring.
Home-less, Not Phone-less
Some people see a homeless person with any sort of technology and think that their homelessness is now canceled. And yet as this person points out, there's s bit of a difference between the cost of a phone and the cost of a home.
Much to this poster's disbelief, having a phone does not equate to having a home. It’s okay—clearly, they are just discovering common sense for the first time, so we can cut them some slack.
Toxic Work Place
Bosses can be so ridiculous in their expectations and assumptions. In this case, this boss angrily texted an employee for sitting during their shift and ended up losing a valuable member of their team.
This employee explained the situation so professionally, that the boss very quickly regretted assuming the reality of the situation. Really, now employees can’t sit? We would get out of that toxic place too.
Changing the Ranks
Usually, when you are feeling moments of doubt, you need words of support. But this friend chose a different route to comfort their friend when they expressed doubts about their move to the U.S.
The poster probably didn't think about this—they're singlehandedly changing the ranks of two entire countries! If that doesn’t convince them that they made the right choice, we don’t know what will.
This guy has a very interesting understanding of what it means to take care of a baby. The father can’t breastfeed, and therefore, he's useless as soon as the baby is born.
We feel bad for his wife, who clearly had to take care of the child raising all by herself. Don’t worry, Ida has come to the rescue to point out just why people who think like this should be nowhere near our policies.
It’s fun to throw some self-deprecating jokes in here and there. It’s a good way to deflect insecurities and poke fun at yourself. But if you're posting them on the internet, you might want to be careful.
People are all too quick to jump in and turn that self-deprecating joke into a major, public insult. With just six little words, this Reddit user has absolutely destroyed the guy above him. We suggest some ice for that burn.
Being petty when it comes to exes is just a part of the territory. And people will find anything to complain about when it comes to their ex-boyfriend’s new girl. But beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right?
This person makes a good point—you might be beautiful but if you are ugly on the inside, then you don’t have much to brag about when your ex-boyfriend chooses a girl that has a good heart.
Setting limits and boundaries with teens is important, but we can't help but think that this mom went overboard giving her son a bedtime of 9 p.m., parental passwords, and no internet access without a parent present. Talk about strict parenting!
She was so proud about it that she posted it on social media, but Brady had the perfect burn for her. He's absolutely right—it won't be so funny when she's in the nursing home.
People are raising their standards when it comes to working these days, and rightfully so. If you don’t offer good wages and a proper work environment, you're going to have trouble finding people to hire.
If you really needed people to come and help you unload, you would've offered more money. Instead, as Dan points out, this company had to unload everything themselves and then turn to the Internet to complain about their cheap wages.
What is it with women trying to post thirst traps on social media to get attention? While it's a bit too desperate for our liking, we still appreciate that this woman shot her shot.
While we're assuming she got a lot of responses, Michael's surely has to be the best. It does indeed look like she's already enjoying her day at the beach.
Getting intimate with someone is a vulnerable process. There's a lot of power one holds after engaging in adult activities—and unfortunately, some people take advantage of this power.
However, even though this girl thought she was bragging about pleasing and then leaving a guy, she was proven wrong when this guy explained that she was really doing what every man dreams of.
Not So Perfect Match
We just love when a person's ego is so fragile that when they shoot their shot and get rejected, they can't take it and they resort to insulting the person they were flirting with.
This Tinder guy couldn't deal with cold hard rejection, so he decided to make fun of this girl's weight, which is never okay. We're loving her well-worded comeback!
Joy of Motherhood
While most women these days go on to become moms, it's a woman's right to choose if they want to be a mom or not. But even still, men like Dale can't help but comment on it.
We're not sure what terrible things happened to Dale, but Sarah put him right in his place. We can't help but think that he was rejected one too many times.
Delete Your Comment
We'll never understand why people feel the need to put others down for no reason. No matter your job or your circumstance, people don’t need to comment on the decisions you make.
Delivering packages is a fine job. In fact, people are almost always excited to receive a package. So not only is this a respectable job, but it is a highly respected job. We agree—no need for your negativity here.
If you try hard enough, any little action, behavior, or thing out of place can be interpreted as someone hiding something from you. But let's be self-aware and recognize the trust issues involved here.
If you're nervous that your partner is hiding something or cheating, there is more to be concerned about than them placing their phone face down. We all need a bit more face-to-face interaction without phone distractions anyways.
Talk about climate change seems to come in and out of the conversation. When there are things that seem like an easy fix, we hyper-fixate on them and then return to our usual ways. But the hole in the ozone layer was a different story.
It turns out that the world works together and tops using certain products known to be harmful to the environment, there are actual positive results. Who would’ve thought?
A story changes based on who's telling it. And when your work relies on reviews from customers, the story they tell is extremely important—it determines if others want to come and use your services too.
When this lady told a story that was clearly false, the employees had a great response. They spared no details and left absolutely nothing to the imagination.
Agree to Disagree
Getting proposed is often one of the happiest moments of one’s life—which is why it should happen on its own day, and not on the same day as another huge accomplishment. Women deserve to feel proud of something without having to associate that day also with getting engaged to their partner.
We don’t necessarily agree that breaking up with your man if he does this, but we also don’t think the issue there would that the proposal would potentially be awkward.
Men Vs. Women
People tend to attack the things they are threatened by. If this was true, it would probably be necessary to suppress women so they wouldn't realize their true gene superiority and retaliate against society.
But while there may be more genes on the x chromosome, the true winner of the most genes is in fact the onion. Guess we all have to start attacking onions before they rise up and realize their superiority.
You Asked for This One
Facebook is incredible—it reminds you of birthdays you never would’ve remembered otherwise. Post a little message to their wall and you don’t have to think about them again for another year. Genius.
But be careful because you never know who is going to interpret your annual birthday message as you trying to steal their girl. This is the only proper response when dealing with an insecure "MAN".
Friends are great for keeping us in check. They make sure we don’t get into trouble and save our butts when our own bad behavior starts to make others upset.
Someone should take Twitter away from celebrities before every one of them starts to taint our fond memories of their performances. This isn’t even the worst tweet we’ve ever seen, but it’s just so unnecessary. Maybe Tim should hang out with Richard Karn again soon to keep him from behaving badly.
If you aren’t obsessed with your dog and want them next to you at all times, we have one question for you—what's wrong with you?
Please don’t adopt if you are not ready for the responsibility that having a puppy comes with. Your dog should be your best friend, not a burden. Just stick to your gaming stations and leave puppies for people who'll love them unconditionally.
Awkward Family Encounters
How do people still not know that the things they post on the Internet are available for everyone to see, including their new family-in-law? We'd really watch what you say.
Folks, please screen your family’s future husbands and wives. We'd be so angry to find out our brother-in-law believes that women like being treated like dirt. Seems like his wife is just interested in men who are dirt.
Respect All Around
Gender-neutral bathrooms have been implemented to give people peace of mind while using public restrooms, without having to disclose their gender. When everyone carries on as normal, they work quite well.
But while this lady was being dramatic about a very casual, normal interaction, Milly Rock explained that actually, both men respected her and gave her the space to go about her business. It’s time to get over yourself.
Gas or Electric
When it comes to cars, everyone thinks theirs is the absolute best. Whether the car takes fuel or electricity to power it, they think they're in the right and everyone who does differently is in the wrong. Like this guy—get those electric cars away from him!
What he doesn’t seem to get, as this commenter points out, is that electricity is everywhere, including in the pumps that pump out gas right into his car. Guess he can’t escape it.
Sometimes the only way to deal with a baffling comment is to put yourself in the person’s shoes and have empathy for them. It must be horrible in that brain of theirs.
Whichever place this comment came from, you have to feel bad for this poster. Not only are their worldviews messed up, but their statement was so over-analyzed that we wouldn’t be surprised if they didn't voice their opinions for a while.
Color Us Confused
Thank goodness for police departments for patrolling our neighborhoods and keeping us safe. Well, that is, if they were ever able to actually do their jobs.
This person had a pretty helpful suggestion for the issue at hand, but according to the responder, he was very clearly wrong. We actually would love to have the information sketched out in crayon. Maybe then we’d be able to fill in the blanks of whatever nonsense they wrote.
This person is trying to make a statement about the priorities and the financial choices that people have these days. But the responder was quick to point out how delusional they actually were about, well, pretty much everything.
That's okay, when someone starts spewing nonsense, clap back with a well-worded and thought-out response, and leave them spluttering for a reply, like this person. Life is indeed about choices—maybe choose to keep your opinion to yourself.
Can You Make a Reservation?
Waiting for a restaurant to have an open table can be annoying. But that is where planning ahead comes in. It's a genius system actually—the restaurant is prepared for you to come in and guarantees that you can skip any line that has formed.
Apparently, this man has never heard of reservations and loves to be frustrated. The world isn’t against you Tim, it just wants you to put your name down and make a plan ahead of time.
We didn’t know this would be surprising for some people to hear, but apparently, people don’t know that their children are not burdens to simply get rid of. This toxic parent who wanted to cut off contact with their daughter was not ready for this comment.
Not only does this person explain how messed up this parent is, but they eloquently point out how they absolutely deserve every ounce of loneliness and regret that they're sure to experience.
Most Expensive Burrito Ever
People seem to think that $15 is simply outrageous to pay people for minimum wage. What's actually outrageous is that minimum wage has only increased by a little, while the prices of everything else have gone up.
Brian has the facts—the minimum wage in DC is already $15 and the price of a burrito has not increased all that much. Thank you anyways, Jordan for your ridiculous burrito input.
If you're a girl who likes sports, you've probably interacted with a boy who expected you to prove your knowledge by asking the most obscure questions.
This is the most clever way to respond when some guy asks you this. Not only did she prove that she knew what she was talking about, but she said it to him in such a way that definitely had him eating his words. You go girl.
If you tell someone you don’t want to be in a relationship with them, the healthy way for them to respond is to respect that decision.
If you're upset that no effort was put in to change your mind, then you should probably reevaluate why you don't want to be in a relationship with them. Or at least reevaluate how quick you are to play games with people.
"She’s Just Not That Into You"
Going out at night as a woman can be scary. And when someone won’t leave you alone until you give them your number, it may feel that your only option is to give them a fake one.
While yes, you might be able to catch a woman in this lie, she's probably giving you a false number for a reason. Get the hint. Stop scaring women and go nurse your bruised ego elsewhere.
When the mask mandate began, people were having trouble getting used to having to wear a mask at all times. We get it, it’s annoying, but are you really “struggling to breathe?”
Surgeons have had to work while wearing masks long before the pandemic and we don’t hear them complaining. We will have to agree with the experts here and say that Bill is, in fact, a drama queen.
R.I.P. Batman’s Parents
Whenever a new sequel comes out, half of the fun is watching the previous versions, to remind yourself of the essential storylines that will carry over into the new release.
This is such an eloquent way of calling someone dumb. The reason we need a huge part repeated in every movie or game is because of the people who don’t understand how series work. Get it together so we don’t have to keep watching Batman's parents die.
The feminist struggle never ends. It's tiring to constantly fight for society to consider women equal. This guy seems to think that the factor of being a feminist is the reason that the women he has met are unhappy.
However, meeting arrogant, annoying men probably has a lot to do with their feelings of dissatisfaction. James Fell is there to point out what he's missing—which is the fact that all of these women, unfortunately, had to meet him.
People love to decide what is socially acceptable for other people. Girls are constantly being told what is appropriate or not to wear. It’s much less common to hear this about men.
However, when it does happen, this is the right comeback. Ladies, we can’t expect the same respect if we are upholding a double standard of what men can and can't wear in public. Teach your kids to worry about themselves, and look elsewhere!
A Ridiculous Checklist
There's a difference between knowing what you want and being so stuck in your ideals that you rule people out immediately. At least give someone a chance before ignoring them just because they aren’t six feet tall.
If a guy said this first to a girl, we would all be appalled. So why is it okay to do the same to men? This is a perfect response that shows just how ridiculous and shallow this woman is.
The Bachelor Franchise loves to claim that it's diversifying its members with each new season. And yet, as we can see, their top choices for the next bachelor are men who look like they could be closely related. Different men, same font.
Not only did this person respond by pointing out their very similar features, but they also managed to insult their haircuts and their names. We're dying at Okayden.
Why is it that men think they are the only ones to know how something simple works? Luckily, if you are tired of getting mansplained to, here's a simple change in mindset that's guaranteed to turn the situation around.
How did this happen so perfectly? Not only is this a hilarious way to respond to mansplaining, but we can see it in action right in front of our eyes.
Wow, some people are so talented. This person has some serious skills to write something so creative and chilling. And on the other hand, some people are so clueless.
Of course, you should call the police if you find some bones somewhere. But moami’s response is so hilarious, that we can’t help but laugh out loud. What a perfect use of the Ying Yang Twins’ popular (and kind of creepy) song.
To stay relevant, celebrities have to get creative. And calling out people and talking in what seems like code is definitely one way to get people’s attention.
We love Nicki—she’s powerful and funny. But as this guy says, she's 39 years old. And while she is still kicking butt and taking names, her tweets are extremely hard to understand.
Game of Thrones fandom is full of dedicated and outspoken people. They wait oh so patiently for George R. R. Martin to come out with a new book every five or so years.
So when Martin insulted people who can sit on Twitter all day and write, this person had something to say. When you can sit and write a book faster, maybe then you can come for others.
Best Response Ever
The audacity that some people have is mind-blowing. To dislike a restaurant because you think you're better than everyone there is an attitude we simply cannot get behind. And neither could the owners of this restaurant.
What a well-written response to a person who is clearly privileged and closed-minded. That's the way to run your restaurant—respect your customers and invite the haters back again. They can’t have much to complain about after that, can they?
After Business Hours
Have you ever been anywhere outside of your house after the hours of 9 p.m. to 5 a.m.? A ridiculous question, right? That's how it sounds when this person said that disabled people shouldn’t leave their homes outside of these hours.
This is a fantastic response. Because people do seem to regard disabled people with the same mystery and ridiculousness as made-up creatures. Come on, Daniel.
My Body My Choice
Does it get any more relevant than this? While the female body and the way it works will probably always be a mystery to men, there's one thing that is so misunderstood: who it belongs to.
We're still confused as to how this got lost in translation. But thankfully, this commenter put it so simply for everyone on the Internet to see.
Here, we can see a classic roast between Britain and the U.S. to decide who's the best. But things have calmed down since the U.S. was literally a colony of Britain. Now we choose to fight with burns over microwaved tea and bland food.
While the U.S. may be easy to make fun of in some aspects, we have endless jokes about how we ended up with better food.
Dinner and Drinks
When you go to a restaurant, leaving a review is a great way to show support and encourage others to come in and try it out for themselves. Or, you can warn others about a bad experience. But at least make sure your reviews are accurate.
You know you're just being difficult when you complain about employees simply doing their jobs.
It’s Probably Not Poison
If we ate from a place twice and got sick both times, we would also be convinced that their food is bad. Unfortunately, there's another option that most people do not want to hear, and it's called I.B.S.
We hate to tell you, but this is only the first stage of grief in finding out you have stomach issues—denial. This pizza place is savage for telling them to seek medical help, but also probably right,
The typical skin care routines of men are severely lacking. Hand soap and body lotion used as face wash and moisturizer are not cutting it. But this guy had a quick-witted response for this woman.
Hey, we can’t help it—some of those filters look so good! They smooth out the texture of our skin and make us look “naturally” beautiful.
Why does everything need to be gendered in our society? Fruit does not belong to women. And fruity, sweet drinks just taste so much better!
After many interactions with people who are salty and bitter, like this woman, a fruit drink is just the refreshment people need. Enjoy your mixed drinks, boys, and don't let people tell you what you can and can't drink.
Hilarious Texts from Terrible Neighbors
If you couldn’t get enough of these well-worded comebacks that were completely savage, don’t miss these epic texts from bad neighbors.
These texts are so terrible that they must be seen to be believed. They’ll give you a new appreciation for your neighbor.