1. Dangerous Silica 

My best friend and her sister shared a room throughout their adolescence. While they were always good kids their mom was a little bit overprotective and very fearful that they would go down the wrong path and start experimenting with alcohol and drugs. While they slept she would smell their clothing to see if she could smell anything funny. 

If she smelled anything that resembled smoke or alcohol she’d go insane. 

One day she goes through the older daughter’s sneakers and finds a small white packet. She took out the belt and started beating her with it. My best friend runs in and says what on earth is going on. 

Her mom said that she didn’t work this hard for her daughters to become addicts and showed them the small packet that she had found.

Turns out it was just the silica gel packet that comes with new sneakers. Their mom didn’t understand because she didn’t know English very well and just assumed it was a packet of substances. 

Talk about a huge misunderstanding. 

2. Overprotective Parents 

An extremely intelligent 14 year-old had just started her first semester on our small college campus. Since she was so young her parents were super overprotective. They would call her at all hours of the day to learn her whereabouts. They’d also have the RA give them reports to verify her story. The parents would also come every Friday to pick her up promptly at 2pm.

Her dad paid the phone bill so he could see every person that she was in contact with. Crazy much?

One of her passions was poetry. Every Thursday there was a poetry night at the quad and she really wanted to participate but was afraid that her parents would find out. 

She decided that she was going to try and quickly go and make it back to her dorm before her parents called for one of their check-ins. She was five minutes late and saw that she missed their call. She told them that she wasn’t feeling too well and was in the bathroom. Her parents didn’t believe her and decided to phone other students to gather more information. 

After a few phone calls one student said that they saw her at the poetry night.

Later that night her mom and dad picked her up and took her name. We never saw her back on campus again. 

3. Coming Out Of His Shell

Back when I used to be a guest lecturer in university I had a student who was homeschooled. He was quite shy and because of this his mother insisted on attending class with him. Not only did she attend class but she observed him as he talked and interacted with his fellow classmates. 

Instead of making things better he just became more shy and nervous which made things worse. 

I made the executive decision to make her attend a different lecture and lab session as him. She was enraged and went to the dean to report me. Instead of being reprimanded the dean said I did the right thing and that she (his mother) was stunting his growth.

At the end of the semester the student thanked me for what I did and said it has helped him break out of his shell and do more things on his own. 

4. Crazy Mom

I was sitting at my desk when my boss called me into his office. It turns out that my mom called him and said she and my father didn’t get enough quality time with me because I was working too much. She requested that I worked reduced hours so I could spend more time at home. I was so embarrassed. 

My boss was livid and told me to get my mom under control. I can’t believe my mom’s nonsense almost caused me to lose my job. After work I went home and yelled at my parents and told them I’m an adult and need to start treating me like one. They have never done anything like that since. 

5. Wicked-In-Law

My wife and her dad had never been close. We would see him every year for the holidays but besides that it was difficult to stay in touch because we lived in Los Angeles and he lived in Michigan. 

He took a trip down to Los Angeles and didn’t inform anyone. Right before he flew out he accused my wife of being a bad daughter because she didn’t visit him. 

Not only was she never informed of the trip but she just had a surgery and wasn’t able to drive by herself. 

When our son was born he didn’t visit us in the hospital till many hours later and when he did visit he was just quiet and distant. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the end of his shenanigans.

He missed our son’s 2nd birthday because he said he had an out of town wedding to attend. Turns out that out of town meant 15 miles away and the wedding wasn’t even the same day as our son’s 2nd birthday. What a jerk. 

For his 3rd birthday he just didn’t bother showing up or telling us why he couldn't make it. When my wife’s mother was diagnosed with cancer and she needed comfort he was just cold and aloof which broke her heart. 

My wife has finally started to call him out on his behavior and I stand up for her when he’s being unreasonable. Even though he says we “ruin Christmas” by starting fights we have to stand up for ourselves. 

6. History Repeats Itself

I’ve been divorced from my husband for a few years and we have a 10 year old son who we share custody of. My mom recently got upset at me because she doesn’t like how much time my son spends with his father. I was puzzled as to why she’d have this reaction. Then it hit me. 

My mother and my father were divorced and the kids were constantly pulled between them like a game of tug of war. None of it was healthy. 

My mom said letting my son spend time with his dad meant that I didn’t care about him. I told her that I’m not going to let history repeat itself and she has no place inserting her opinions about how I raise my children. 

7. No Support 

I got accepted into an amazing university on a partial scholarship. I was super excited. The only catch was that it was out of state. My parents had initially agreed to pay for my tuition but retracted the offer when they found out how far away I was going. They said they’d pay only if I went to the local college.

If I didn’t they said that they would never accept me back into the house and I could live on my own.

I listened to them and went to the local school but ended up getting kicked out for poor grades. It’s been nearly 20 years since then and they’re still supporting my brother and his wife while he is getting his “fourth degree”.

Did I say degree, I meant his gambling habit. 

8. Baby Don’t Cry

I recently moved out of Oregon and now live in Texas and have noticed that my allergies have gotten much worse. I used to not have a problem when I was back home but maybe the change in climate was affecting me. I was with a friend and she said that she had some Benadryl that I could take. 

I told her it wouldn’t work because I had a tolerance to Benadryl. This didn’t make sense to her because I had said that I didn’t have any issues with allergies in Oregon. So why would I need to take Benadryl. 

I told her that until I was about 16 I took benadryl every night on the orders of my mother. She would make me take it so I could fall asleep sooner and give her some peace and quiet.

I could tell by my friend’s stunned reaction that she was definitely judging my mom’s parenting. 

9. Cheaters Never Prosper 

When my sister was 23 her fiancee who was 28 passed suddenly from a congenital heart defect. It was extremely sudden and his loss was traumatic. After he passed she learned that during their four year relationship he had cheated on her with a number of different women.

Some were long term affairs and they knew all about my sister and some were just hookups from the bar. 

This really hurt my sister as there was no way to ever ask her fiance any questions about why he did it. She could never get closure. She questioned if she’d ever be good enough. 

About a year after his passing she actually connected with one of her fiance's good friends. They clicked immediately and eventually started dating. It turns out that she had met her soulmate.

Their five year wedding anniversary is this summer. 

10. Not Better Together 

After enduring decades of countless knockdown dragout fights between my mom and dad I was relieved that they were finally getting separated. Whenever I used to ask them about their fighting they just said it was normal for married couples to fight. I’m finally glad they’ve come to their senses. 

They both realize how unhealthy their marriage was not only for them but also my siblings and I. Seeing screaming, yelling, and tears on a nearly daily basis is not the way a family should be. 

I wouldn’t classify them as bad people. They were just trying to be good parents and ultimately thought my siblings and I would be better off if we kept the family together. In reality it probably would’ve been better to go their separate ways years ago. 

My mom dropped a huge bombshell on us a few months after they separated. She was a lesbian. Part of the reason they fought so much is neither of them could meet the needs of the other person. 

I’m glad the truth is out and now people can live their best lives. 

11. Long-Lost Child

My parents had three children when they were teenagers before finally having me when my mom was 21 years old. I was their fourth child. 

Already struggling to raise my three older siblings, they decided it would be better to put me up for adoption. To be fair, they had a number of financial issues as well as substance abuse problems. 

I was adopted by a family who loved me very much and happened to live only an hour away from my biological parents. I even ended up back there when I attended college. 

When I was a junior in college I decided to try and find my biological parents. I learned that they had divorced shortly after I was born. My biological mom has been in and out of jail since but it looks like my biological dad has been able to get his act together. 

He’s been sober for a number of years and has a new wife. He’s even started going to church and has built a career for himself. He told his new wife about me but none of my siblings know that I even exist. 

I found his work phone number and gave him a call. I was super nervous as I didn’t know how he’d react. As soon as I started speaking he knew who was calling him. 

Since I’d turned 18 he’d been waiting for me to reach out. He didn’t want to shake up my life and that’s why he never reached out to me. He wanted me to do it on my own terms whenever I was ready. He took me to meet the whole family including my three older siblings. 

It’s been a few years since then and I’ve slowly been building my relationship with my new family. 

12. Playing Favorites 

For my birthday my parents got me a pack of socks. Even though it was kind of a lame gift I was still grateful to get anything. However, right before I opened them my mom said she found another pair on sale and she was going to return them so she could get those socks for me.

A few months pass and my brother asks my parents for an archery set. They ask him how much it is and he says $500 dollars. They readily agree and my brother has the set the next day. Meanwhile, I still haven’t received my socks. 

You can probably guess who my parent’s favorite child is. 

13. Inconsiderate Family

While I was in the hospital undergoing cancer treatment my mom wrote a check to herself using my checkbook and then brought it to me to sign. 

When I saw she wrote the check for $10,000 I told her that I don’t have that kind of money as everything is going towards paying my medical bills. She got super upset and said that I owed her the money for all that she’s done throughout my life. I didn’t have time to deal with this and I told her to just leave. I needed to focus all my available energy fighting my cancer. 

My sister began to call me non stop and got upset that I wasn’t calling her back. I told her I’ve been tired lately and have been sleeping more. Rather than being empathetic to my situation she called me a bad sibling and refused to talk to me. Why is my family acting like this when I need them most?

14. Hidden Secret 

I had always believed that my grandpa had two other brothers. Recently I’ve learned that he actually had another brother that has been kept a secret for years.

The reason is straight out of a spy movie. He fought in World War II and was killed by his own men when he was found to be a German sympathizer who was acting as a double agent. 

They woke him up in the middle of the night and marched him to a forest where they killed him and just left him for dead. They didn’t even bother burying him. 

The army wrote back to the family saying he had been killed in action but a family friend in the army had the real details and told them what actually happened. They were in total shock that their son was a traitor. 

Since they found out they haven’t spoken about it for over 50 years. 

15. Murderous Grandpa

My grandpa tried to murder my dad with an ax. I know what you’re thinking. That sounds absolutely insane and trust me it is. He showed up to my dad’s workplace one day as my dad was heading back to his car in the parking lot and just started swinging the ax wildly in my dad’s direction. 

Luckily, my dad was able to fend him off and escape. My dad didn’t call the police since it was his father and he thought maybe he needed mental help.

However, my grandpa came back to my dad’s work parking lot the next day to do the same thing. My dad didn’t go to work that day and when my grandpa realized it he took his own life using the ax.

I still have trouble believing that story to this day. It sounds like something you’d see in a movie or tv show.

16. History of Great-Grandparents

My great-great-grandfather on my mom’s side was accused of killing his brother’s wife. This has caused division in the family because some family members believed he did it while others believed that he was innocent. 

In a separate tragedy, my great-grandmother returned to her home in Poland during the 1940s to find her entire family just gone. The house was completely empty and no one was to be found. 

Turns out that they were captured by the German and sent to concentration camps while she was out of town. She was able to escape to Switzerland and was able to get by as a cleaner.

After D-Day she was able to reunite with a few of her surviving family members and they ended up starting a business selling clothes and toys. 

17.  Told Ya So 

My aunt dated this guy named John. John was your typical social butterfly, Everyone adored him and he was always the center of attention and the life of the party. I noticed that John loved showing affection to my aunt even in public. He’d hug her from behind and kiss her and I thought it was sweet how much he adored her. 

Turns out that what I thought was PDA was actually part of the physical and mental harm that John was putting my aunt through. What I thought were neck kisses weren’t actually neck kisses. 

John actually would get behind her and whisper horrible things in her ear. He would constantly berate her. My grandpa found out about this and decided to go to John’s house and confront him.

He went to John’s house and told him that if she ever tells me that you’ve harmed her again you’re going to be sorry. 

About a month passes and my aunt has a black eye and her arm is in a cast. 2 days later they find John dead on the roof of his apartment building. There isn’t a doubt in my mind about who put him there. 

My grandfather was never accused but even if he was, he was an extremely successful lawyer who had a ton of legal connections. He said John was a nice young man and it’s too bad he got into an accident. Grandpa may be playing it off but the rest of the family knows the truth. 

18. Crazy Bachelor Party

I had a really awesome uncle who would come to our house during the holidays. It was always a fun time when he was around. It was always fun to visit him because he had a lot of cats and dogs that we could play with. He had married my aunt shortly before I was born. 

One summer when I was about 14 my mom and I went to their house to visit. There was also this girl there who looked to be about 1-2 years older than me. 

It turns out that this girl was my cousin. She was my uncle’s daughter. He said he only learned about her a few days ago. When I heard the story of how she was born I was in disbelief.

During my uncle’s bachelor party his friends hired a prostitute. Things ended up getting out of hand and one thing led to another and fifteen years later we have my cousin. 

She ended up being really nice and my uncle was ecstatic to get to know her and be a part of her life. Even my aunt took the situation surprisingly well. My uncle even decided to start paying child support to help her mother out. 

We still haven’t met her mom but we’re just glad she’s part of the family now. 

19. Snooping Mom

I had a really horrible breakup with one of my partners who I ended up having a child with. She definitely was crazy and tried to do everything in her power to keep my daughter away from me.

Totally normal behavior right. After a few years of custody battles I was finally granted full custody of my daughter. I’m glad the judge saw through her facade.

Occasionally she would check in with my daughter and myself to see how things were going and she seemed to know private details about our life that no one else could know. Like what clothes we had just bought or places we just went to. It was just flat out weird and I could never figure out who was giving her that information. 

After my mom passed we were going through her Facebook to update it and I noticed that my mom had been passing on information to my ex for years. A lot of it painted me in a bad light which I certainly didn’t appreciate. 

My guess is that she felt bad that my ex had lost custody of her daughter and didn’t get to be a large part of her life, but how could she do that to her own son. It’s been a couple years since she’s passed and I still haven’t visited her grave with my family. I’m not sure when I’ll be able to forgive her. 

20. Horrible Parents

When I was a senior in high school my parents kicked me out of my house for being gay. Even though I had come out a while ago my boyfriend coming over on Christmas to exchange gifts just pushed them over the edge. 

They gave me an ultimatum. I could break up with him and I’d be able to stay otherwise I’d have to leave. I decided to ignore their ultimatum and one day after school I came home to find out that all the locks had been changed. 

I ended up going to stay with my aunt for a while as I figured out what I was going to do. My boyfriend’s mom found out what happened and made my parents let me in the house so I could at least collect some of my belongings. 

She even let me stay with them. A couple weeks after moving in with them my parents showed up at their door with police officers claiming that I was being brainwashed and that I needed to come home. They also said that I was being held against my will. 

The whole ordeal had to be resolved in court. I ended up getting emancipated so I could stay with them as I finished high school.

It’s been over a decade since I’ve finished high school and I haven’t spoken to my parents since. My brother still stays in touch with me and has told me that mom and dad are manipulative and toxic as ever. This just confirms that I made the right decision by deciding to cut them off.  

21. The Truth Will Come Out 

My mom had a really tough upbringing. She was raised by her mom and her stepfather who was abusing her from a young age. I asked my grandma where dad was. She said he passed away when my mother was 5. 

That would mean that he died in 1955. 50 years later and my sister has gotten curious about her family and the various members we have out there. She starts doing a number of DNA and genealogy tests. She finds out that grandpa didn’t die in 1955 but rather in 1995. Oh but it gets better. 

He ended up having another family where he had four daughters, one of which had the same name as my mom. The only reason my mom never had a relationship with him is because my grandma lied to maintain her control and power. Maybe the abuse could’ve stopped if grandpa had known about it. 

My grandma hasn’t changed in her old age. She’s still quite a nuisance and bothers my parents to this day.

She ended up visiting us one weekend and as we were having dinner I revealed everything that I knew and asked her how she could lie to everyone for 50 years. Instead of being apologetic she got upset that I found out and told everyone her secret. 

My parents told her to shut up and that they were sick and tired of her lies. 

22. Psycho Father

The story that I was always told about my father is that he left me shortly after I was born. I didn’t think anything of it until one of my uncle’s mentioned that my dad had blonde hair. This was strange because everyone else in my family up to that point said that he had black hair just like my mom. 

When I was joining the army I had to dig up my birth certificate as proof of identification. It said that my father was named Ricky Roberts. My last name was also Roberts so you may think what is so weird about that. The weird part is that my family told me that they picked my name from one of those baby name books and that’s why my last name is Smith. 

Now that I had my father’s name I was going to do some digging. 

Turns out he was born in Ukraine and had his name changed when he came to the states. All that checks out as I know that I’m part Ukrainian. Also his mother and my grandma had the exact name Svetlana Azarenka so I knew that this was definitely my father. 

I asked my family if Ricky Robers was my father and they said that he was. They told me that shortly after I was born he didn’t want a child anymore. He decided that he was going to try and kill me. He attempted to suffocate me with a pillow. 

I’m so lucky that my sister and aunt were able to stop him but by the time we called the cops he had left. He wasn’t gone for long because later that night he returned and killed our pet cat and set fire to our house. While everyone in my family’s house was alright the fire spread to a neighbor’s house and someone lost their life. 

He was caught and sentenced to life in prison. He would never be allowed in the outside world again. 

My family didn’t tell me because I was so young and they wanted me to live a normal life and without having to carry the burden that my father tried to kill me and is in prison for the rest of his life.

When I asked them if they ever planned to tell me they said no. As mad as I was at them for keeping the secret for so long I get why they did it. 

23. Secret Vacation

When I was five my mom and grandma (maternal) decided to go on vacation for six weeks. They’d never been on vacation just the two of them and thought it would be a great way to bond.

My grandparents (paternal) were going to take care of me while they were gone. When my mom returned she had brought back maracas which is something that Spain is famous for. 

Even though she said she went to Spain there were no pictures and they didn’t describe anything they did there in detail. This was strange because normally when grandma went places she would take a ton of photos and have a million different stories to tell. 

When I was about 10 I asked her for more details on Spain but she would just say things like Spain was cool and the food was amazing. 

I never saw a passport stamp or a passport for that matter. In fact, about a decade later I overheard a comment she made to someone mentioning that she’d never traveled overseas in her life. 

I spoke up and said, "Mom, what about the month you spent in Spain when I was little?" She got quiet. I think she was hoping that I had forgotten about that trip. Something was off about the whole situation. 

My mom had tried getting rid of the maracas when I was a child but I never let her because I said how could she donate the one souvenir she decided to bring back. When I was about twelve they just disappeared one day. She even had told me that they weren’t really maracas. 

I asked her what they were then. She just gave me the run around before eventually getting quiet and changing the subject. 

It took me decades before I finally started piecing things together. Her trip to Spain took place at a time where abortions were illegal where we were living.

I theorized that my grandma and her either went to the UK or Canada and were trying to find a medical clinic to perform the abortion. This was no vacation.

We had barely been making ends meet at the time and we lived in a run-down 1 bedroom apartment. Mom probably decided that she couldn’t afford to have a second child and confided in grandma who hatched up the plan. I don’t think my Dad had any clue. 

It kind of makes sense the more I think about it. My mom is pro-choice yet she’s a staunch Republican. She’s never had drug issues or mental health problems so I can pretty confidently rule out therapy or rehab. 

Even though we didn’t have any money my grandma was fairly wealthy so coming up with the funds for a one month trip wouldn’t have been difficult for her. Unfortunately, my grandma has passed so I’ll never be able to hear her side of the story.

The biggest clue that I have is my mom’s view on abortion. She would never support something that doesn’t fall under her party’s views unless she’s had a first hand experience with the issue. I’ve yet to confront her about things and I’m not sure if I’ll ever have the courage to bring it up. 

24. Wrong Culture

I was born and raised in Indonesia and after moving to Canada she wanted to make sure that we didn’t lose our heritage and get “corrupted” by Western ideals. 

She also hated if anyone confused us for being something other than Indonesian. In my early 30s I found that I wasn’t even Indonesian but actually Chinese. 

My mom thought the truth was embarrassing so she lied to my siblings and I our whole lives. I never understood why she felt the need to lie about where we were from. 

The reason she emphasized Indonesian culture so much is because once the lie spread she wanted to make sure it was convincing to avoid being caught by anyone. We now greet her with “Ni Hao” everytime we see her just to push her buttons. 

25. Scammer Gran

When my grandpa passed we found out my grandma was not actually officially married to him. She said that didn’t want to get married to him because she wanted to live off Social Security and welfare checks. She had no interest in working a day in her life. 

When she was pregnant with my aunt she made up that they were married because she said it was in poor taste to be pregnant and unmarried. 

She’s been living off of Social Security, but the government recently found out about her deception and is thinking about stopping its benefits. Turns out she’s been a money hungry person her whole life and this is her comeuppance. 

26. Let’s Start A Baseball Team

I have a whopping ten siblings. All of us share the same father. Before my dad passed I was only aware of eight of them. It turns out that two of my so-called cousins were actually my brother and sister.

My father had cheated on his wife at the time with her sister and those two kids were born out of wedlock. When my mom died I also found out that one of my sisters was actually only my half-sibling. I always thought we had shared the same parents. 

After doing more digging it turns out I only have 1 full-blood sibling who just happens to be my twin. I’m only really close with him and my previously mentioned half-sister. While I don’t have a bad relationship with the rest of my siblings we just really aren’t that close. 

27. Missed Call

During my sophomore year of college I had gone to the movies with my friends and I had turned off my phone. My mom decided to call me and it went straight to voicemail. You would think she would just call one time and then wait for me to get back to her. 

My mom didn’t do this. She proceeded to call me 15 times and leave 15 separate voicemails all of which were well over a minute long. My dad, who is totally normal, sent me one text with three words: “call your mom”.

It turns out there was no big emergency. She just wanted to tell me that her favorite contestant on American Idol has just gotten eliminated. 

28. DNA Discovery

I had recently done a DNA test and along with my online results there was an option that allowed for close contacts to reach out to me. I was curious but didn’t expect anything out of the ordinary. A first cousin reached out to me via the website. This was someone who I had never met or heard of. I learned that my aunt put him up for adoption when he was born. 

My aunt didn’t tell anyone except my mother who finally told me after I told her about what I discovered on the DNA website. 

Now my aunt avoids me everytime the family gets together because she’s embarrassed that I know her secret. Even though I don’t really care that she had a son and put him up for adoption she still avoids me at all costs. 

29. A Snowstorm For The Ages

When I was three my sister and I were at home where we were being watched by our nanny. This was a common occurrence as our parents worked in the city and we lived in the suburbs. One day my parents went to work and they didn’t come back. In fact we didn’t see them for six months. 

During those six months my parents had gone through absolute hell. The day they left us they ended up getting snowed in their office buildings due to a record-breaking snowstorm. Since they couldn’t come home my nanny called the authorities and said we had abandoned our children. 

She was able to take temporary custody of my sister and I and my parents had to petition and plead for six months until they were deemed “fit to take care of us”. I really thought my parents had just walked out on us. 

30. Greedy Mother

My friend’s mom was so devious. She literally was the devil incarnate. Six months before my friend’s dad passed his wife took out a life insurance policy on him for $200,000. He died because he had a bad reaction to his medication that he had taken all his life with no incident. 

She also took out a 100k life insurance policy on her son although she never tried to harm him. This was not the end of her shenanigans. She was able to transfer the $100,000 left to him by his father into her name.

In addition, his grandma’s inheritance also ended up in her greedy little hands. She gave some of that money to her friend’s while the rest she used to put a down payment down on a beach house.  

She would also pretend to be ill in order to get prescription drugs that she could then resell on the black market. She even kept a little notebook to detail all her transactions and how much money she was making. 

31. Cult Following

My uncle had moved out of his old house and was unable to sell it before he moved. Even after a year the house hadn’t sold and he was confused as to why. He called his realtor to get to the bottom of things.

He found out that my aunt had taken down all the for sale signs and had been squatting in the house since he had moved out. When she was caught sold everything in the house and took the wiring and pipes for good measure. 

She also has these business cards where she refers to herself as “Dr. Reverend”. Trust me she is no doctor. She has never attended a day of college in her life. Recently she moved to Michigan where she purchased this farm property that has a huge estate. In addition to my aunt, about thirty of her “followers” live there too.

Hmm if it looks like a cult, smells like a cult, and walks like a cult then it must be a cult. 

32. Swinger Sisters 

It looks like my sister had swapped husbands with another couple on her block. The reason I think this is because each family’s children look more like they belong with the other family and not their own.

My younger sister is cheating on her husband with another woman and he has no idea. She just keeps saying she has work retreats and conferences but in reality she’s going to sneak off with the other woman.

Because my brother-in-law doesn’t suspect her of being lesbian she’s never suspicious that she spends so much time with her female coworker. 

33. Hidden Child

Through an obituary my mom discovered that she had an uncle that she never knew about. She asked my grandfather (her dad) about it and he said his parents put her in a mental institution when she was a teenager during the 1950s because she was considered “wild and unstable”. After they left her there they proceeded to never bring her up again. 

My grandpa didn’t want to elaborate on the topic further and just kept repeating that she was wild and sent away and that there was nothing more to the story. Essentially he was telling my mom to drop it and move on. 

There is definitely more to the story that he isn’t telling. This is a part of my family history that I may just never find out.